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Discussion Would you stab someone or reason with them?

Misu

The forum's immigrant
I'm not gonna give up on this subject and I want everyone to provide their opinions for the best to speak up, honestly. I want you all to give a moment to critically analyze this discussion and seek mostly what is highly correct.

If someone said something they were completely unaware (or did not knew) it would be highly offensive towards you, would you stab them harder in the back or would you talk it over on correcting the person's harsh mistake for a settlement?

Do you think you should only be seeking a resolution to yourself or for everyone involved, including you?

I may have done horrible mistakes which are mostly unintentional but whenever something goes wrong, I seek resolution for everyone and I try to correct my mistakes whenever someone points them out. You think people solve situations by striving or throwing them off a bridge? Feuding does not solve anything in life, it only builds the latter; it makes you the enemy of another eye. But I'm not a quitter on socializing or befriending. If something has gone wrong, I want a resolution to it, if it's correcting my wrong side (fixing my mind). Every one of us is in the development of being a good person and something wrong will bound to come across at any moment in life -- we are the ones who provoke it. If fighting or striving is what you do to correct the situation, then think again. If words brought two worlds apart, then words can be powerful enough to bring them back to together.

Which way you think its best and do you truly believe you are doing the right thing?
 

the_flow

Member
It honestly depends on the person. Everyone makes mistakes, obviously, and usually a simple "woah, what?" or a shifty-eyed look will filter out the people who have good yet ignorant intent.

Outside of that, continuing to engage with a person who would knowingly try to offend you is usually just a waste of time. Instead of stabbing them back and spilling more blood, you could just walk away. Block them online, or cut ties with them in reality. Not every wrong needs to be righted, because sometimes it just takes more effort than it's worth to convince people that what they're doing is scummy.

Of course, I've always been a bit passive when it comes to stuff like this, but now it just isn't worth my time anymore.
 

curato

Member
Too many people go out of their way these days to offend for offences sake or you can say anything without someone figuring out how to be offended. Offence is too much work, if someone says something will it matter tomorrow to your life at all that they said it? If not, then it is easier to just set that burden down.
 

Pfap

Member
Jordan Peterson *shudders* I wouldn't look to that guy for life advice...
@Fanatrick I knew that link was going to a Peterson video or page before I clicked it lol.
He can be overbearing at times and maybe hyper intellectual is the term or out of touch. But, I do like quite a few of his lectures.

Anyways, I would say you can look to anybody for life advice I mean everybody is alive; maybe don't model yourself after any specific individual, but listen to everybody and then decide for yourself.

Do you think you should only be seeking a resolution to yourself or for everyone involved, including you?
I guess, I'm pretty big on everybody being and thinking as an individual. I feel that otherwise you get into the territory of justified violence... something along the lines of, the group which has x amount of individuals wants to stab the offending individual, so the group will elect an individual to stab the offending individual. That was wordy and probably not very clear, but basically a gang. And gangs are notorious for stabbing people and going to prison and then stabbing people in prison or rather gang members.

What I'm trying to say is that I would rather talk it out, but if some group that I belong to is being stabbed or stabbing and I'm expected to stab it becomes increasingly difficult and more dangerous not to stab.

Maybe the underlying issue is that it is often times hard to communicate and reason, but stabbing while causing more problems is arguably and sadly easier.
 

Misu

The forum's immigrant
Ok ok ok some of you guys gave good opinions but you guys got the wrong idea when I said "stab someone in the back". Its not literal context actually.
Im not talking about violence here, im talking about hurting someones feelings or punishing them harshly. When you make a mistake unintentionally or unaware to someone, its best to reason with the person instead of hurting them back by doing a bruteful move or action. This can be hurting their feeling back or sabotaging by telling others fake terrible stories about yourself, or even banning them from a server without thinking of talking the problem over. I am not fond with taking "eye for an eye" remedies and I definitely wouldnt try offending a person back because it only causes things to get worse. Making feud and enemies does not solve anything, it leaves a wound without healing.
 

Pfap

Member
Ok ok ok some of you guys gave good opinions but you guys got the wrong idea when I said "stab someone in the back". Its not literal context actually.
Im not talking about violence here, im talking about hurting someones feelings or punishing them harshly. When you make a mistake unintentionally or unaware to someone, its best to reason with the person instead of hurting them back by doing a bruteful move or action. This can be hurting their feeling back or sabotaging by telling others fake terrible stories about yourself, or even banning them from a server without thinking of talking the problem over. I am not fond with taking "eye for an eye" remedies and I definitely wouldnt try offending a person back because it only causes things to get worse. Making feud and enemies does not solve anything, it leaves a wound without healing.
Oh you are talking about being resentful... like that person forgot my birthday and I never forget their birthday; so, now I'm going to forget their birthday this year.
 

Misu

The forum's immigrant
Oh you are talking about being resentful... like that person forgot my birthday and I never forget their birthday; so, now I'm going to forget their birthday this year.
Correct. I never knew resentful was a word but good to know now.
I have gotten several situations where people would now prefer to be with ke nor treat me right. I try to be a good person but this world is just oddly cruel for to taking extreme remedies to resolve situations that unintentionally go out of hand.
 

Pfap

Member
Correct. I never knew resentful was a word but good to know now.
I have gotten several situations where people would now prefer to be with ke nor treat me right. I try to be a good person but this world is just oddly cruel for to taking extreme remedies to resolve situations that unintentionally go out of hand.
Yea, I would say it sucks for both groups though. It's not a productive use of anybody's time and I would say the person who is intentionally doing the "stabbing" ends up feeling worse about it. Like in the birthday example instead of just thinking maybe the friend genuinely forgot and might even feel bad about forgetting, they decide to un friend him... well, now all that happens is 2 birthday parties are missed. It's like ****... I don't want to miss out on a party just because I'm trying to teach someone a lesson on not forgetting my birthday.

Sidenote:
I need to start keeping a calendar or better in touch with people... or sign up for Facebook to get birthday notifications lol.
 
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