> Tsme Fack: Return
Return? It was never gone. Whachu talkin' about?
> How 'bout a nice recap?
Alright, fine. I suppose it's fair to give you a recap in case you need a refreseher after all this time. And if you're a new reader or have missed some updates, you may want to take a look at the archive. It shows the full story so far, explaining things in more detail and letting you catch up better:
http://yokcos.co.uk/adventures/?story=TsmeFack ANYWAY, enough of that, time for the recap.
> Finally! recap RECAP R-E-C-A-P!!!!
Our story begins with the bravest hero of them all, George Von Spaghettishirt. He was, and is, magnificent. He had gone on a perilous journey, travelling the land, defeating fiend after fiend until one day, everything changed. Fortunately, you don't need to worry about that. You're not him. And while he was busy saving the world, you were stuck in your own home, trapped by a person who apparently loves interior design. You escape your prison, only to discover your homer, which is a living, mobile house, has been taken to a random Engrish city. You face down your captor, who was waiting for the roof, and in this heroic struggle... You get your ass kicked, and he drops you off in a random café so you can wait for him there. Naturally, when he comes back, you burn down the coffee shop. Because of course you do. At that point, he decides that things have gotten a bit too hot here, so he decides to drag you off to the Church of M. And that's it. You're on the way to the Church of M now.
>Tell him you don't believe in M
"I can't believe the Church of M still exists," you believe to explain, "it's low brain activity crap no one should waste their time on. No wonder you're religious, though. Searching for actual answers would require you to actually use both your brain cells. I don't understand what you're trying to achieve here. I don't need your gods of the gaps nonsense, I'm an atheist!"
"What's that on your head, then?"
"You couldn't even begin to understand the profound message behind it. Wearing the August Cap as an atheist is the truest expression of self-awareness, with more levels of irony than a simpleton like you could even comprehend. Why am I even trying to explain that to you? What a waste of time."
>Wonder where the cat thing is
You have no idea
>Release a swarm of termites on your captor then make your escape while he's distracted
Unfortunately, you don't have any
>Wait for him to get distracted then reach for the knob on his back and set him to the wrong time
You feel around for a knob but there isn't one. The clock gets what you're trying to do and plays along. His face didn't show the right time in the first place, but good job
> Attempt to distract the clock with friendly banter
and
> Ask why you are being taken to the Church of M
He's ignoring you
>He's got enough spinning momentum to become a bowling ball. OPEN THE CHURCH DOOR!
Off you g-...
> Suddenly switch to another character
This is the last straw! Bringing in an arsonist? The Church has been getting away with too much sh*t lately. Someone needs to put them in their place, and if the police won't do it, damn it, you will!