Forum Game Sandwich Robots - No Robots Yet

[roytheshort]

Sandwich Robots

What is this?

Sandwich Robots is a surrealist, legitimate, free for all roleplaying game. Feel free to sign up. This version will have a few minor differences, for example, only one person can sign up at a time. You'll see the others soon.

Notable Events
-

Old Version
The old Sandwich Robots topic.

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Sandwich Robots:
The town is empty, there is not a soul. The sandwich stand has nobody in front of it. Not a merchant in sight. There are several narrow streets and the odd shop here and there. The entire place is silent.

Locations:
The Town

Waiting List:
-

 

[Mercerenies]

I sign up. That is to say, I take a sharpie and sign the front of the sandwich stand in giant letters.

 

[Lukasmah]

I sign down.

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Mercerenies

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Mercerenies walks into the empty town, it is barren. He signs the front of the Sandwich Stand. Writing "Sandwich Stand" in large letters. Even though it already says that. So now there's a Sandwich Stand which says "Sandwich Stand Sandwich Stand". Mercerenies thought for a second, and realized he meant to write his own name. So now it says "Sandwich Stand : Mercerenies Sandwich Stand".

The phone at the stand starts ringing quite loudly.

Locations:
The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Mercerenies Sandwich Stand

Waiting List:
Lukasmah

 

[Mercerenies]

Noticing the waiting list, I grab the phone and put it up to my ear, "Lukasmah's Sandwich Emporium, where all the sandwiches taste like your grandmother's basement had an evil twin! What can I do for you today?"

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Mercerenies

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Mercerenies sits behind his stand and yells into the phone...

"Lukasmah's Sandwich Emporium, where all the sandwiches taste like your grandmother's basement had an evil twin! What can I do for you today?" "Uh... yeah... this is Derek Time Insurance. I've been meaning to call a Mr. Watcher Flynn?"

"No Watcher Flynn here, only the worst sandwiches in the world! You're a terrible human being and my boss Lukasmah hates you so much! Really he does! He once made 10 sandwiches which said "I HATE DEREK" and he threw them all in the garbage. But it's ok, we made those sandwiches with our worst ingredients!"

"Sir, please..."

"Honestly, Derek, if I knew your mother I'd wish I never met her. I hate you, and I work for Lukasmah, who also hates you."

"Sir, I can see you from the window. That isn't Lukasmah's Sandwich Emporium."

Mercerenies notices a man looking at him from one of the buildings in the street. He is holding up a phone, he moves his spectacles up onto his nose and he doesn't look very happy. Mercerenies is still holding the phone.

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Mercerenies Sandwich Stand
- - Mercerenies
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time

Waiting List:
Lukasmah

 

[Mercerenies]

Using my super fantastical masterful alchemy magic, I transmute the phone in my hand into a laser gun from the planet Zr'rthlgon and fire it at the man's building.

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Mercerenies

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Mercerenies starts making strange sounds and waving his hands about, he also does a strange dance. "This is my alchemy magic." he says as nothing happens, he tries to imagine it becomes a laser gun from the planet Zr'rthlgon. But sadly he lives in the real world. At this point Derek puts the phone down and wanders off inside the building to make himself a cup of tea.

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Mercerenies Sandwich Stand
- - Mercerenies
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time

Waiting List:
Lukasmah

 

[Mercerenies]

Gah! I forgot the crucial flaw in alchemy: it doesn't exist! I tear the phone from the telephone stand and throw it at the building.

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Mercer▬7Bkasmah

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Mercerenies gets angry, and decides to rip the phone from the telephone stand and Ì♫CÌ▬╗ Lukasmah throws the phone at the building after ripping it from the stand. Who would have thought that idiot would have fallen for the Mercerenies's Sandwich Emporium scam? Really, he can blatantly see from his window it says Lukasmah Sandwich Stand. Something doesn't seem quite right, but that honestly isn't a problem.

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Lukasmah Sandwich Stand
- - Lukasmah
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time

Waiting List:
Mercerenies

 

[Lukasmah]

Ooooh... So, just like Tic Tac Toe started out based on a game with strict rules and turned into a game in which you can do anything, the new version of Sandwich Robots is based on a game in which you can do anything and then restricts you.

EDIT: Ninja

EDIT: Lukasmah walks towards the building where Derek is.

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Lukasmah

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Lukasmah walks out of the Sandwich Stand and into Derek Time Insurance. A confused receptionist stands at the main desk, having seen you throw a phone onto the ground and shout obscenities at Mr. Time through the phone, she is very worried. You hear footsteps coming from upstairs.

"Have you heard from Mr. Flynn yet, this is very..."

Derek stops when he reaches the bottom of the stairs.
He stares at you and does not say a word.

§ÌÌbp Mercerenies wonders where he is, he finds himself in a Ìo╣ it seems ÌãoÌ▬!

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Lukasmah Sandwich Stand
- - Broken Phone
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time
- - Lukasmah
- - Confused Receptionist

Waiting List:
Mercerenies

 

[Mercerenies]

Mercerenies marvels at all the pretty Unicode characters that are in the town of ÌãoÌ▬, Waiting List. He takes as many of them as he can carry with him and then decides to try something. He takes out the sharpie and writes U+202E RIGHT-TO-LEFT OVERRIDE. With any luck, this will reverse the order of all the characters floating around.

 

[Lukasmah]

"Hello there, good sir. I'm not sure what happened to my phone, so I've decided to come here and talk to you in person. I'm afraid I don't know Mr. Flynn. Wrong number, I suppose. Anyway, I just wanted to clarify that, so I'l leave now. Good luck contacting Mr. Flynn and goodbye."

Spoiler

 

[Yokcos]

I arrive on the scene to remove the W from The Town. It is now The Ton. Everything suddenly gets a lot lighter.

Inventory
----------------------------------------------------------------
W (1)
Knife Butter (∞)

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Lukasmah

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
"Hello there, good sir. I'm not sure what happened to my phone, so I've decided to come here and talk to you in person. I'm afraid I don't know Mr. Flynn. Wrong number, I suppose. Anyway, I just wanted to clarify that, so I'l leave now. Good luck contacting Mr. Flynn and goodbye."

You walk out the building and the Receptionist and Derek try and ignore you. They carry on speaking about Watcher Flynn. It seems odd, you could have sworn earlier this town was completely deserted. Maybe you should have more of a look around?

ðá╬╬ÇCÌÄÌ««M remove the W from Town, but I can't find the town"

Yokcos looks around and doesn't see much of anything, not a single building. Except Mercerenies. "I can't find my sharpie. This is annoying. I wanted to turn everything back to front but there isn't much of «Mâ4♫ÌÄ«á

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Lukasmah Sandwich Stand
- - Lukasmah
- - Broken Phone
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time
- - Confused Receptionist

Waiting List:
Mercerenies
Yokcos

 

[Lukasmah]

I point at the nearest person to me.

 

[Mercerenies]

Lukasmah stole my sharpie! I swear vengeance on Lukasmah for all of time! Let history remember these coming days as the Sharpie Wars! Since it worked so well last time, I use my alchemy magic to transform Yokcos into a sharpie.

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Yokcos

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Yokcos points at the person nearest to him. Logically, he is always the nearest person to himself. So he simply points at himself.

The Receptionist looks concerned at ÌMÜÌ7B▬ the goings on outside the building, where a man appears to be shouting about sharpies for whatever reason. "He stole my sharpie, where is he, where is Lukasmah? I'll use my MÜÌ▬ alchemy magic to turn myself into a sharpie, wait, I have a sharpie. Ì░áùCL▬ why do I have a sharpie?" At this point Yokcos stops pointing at himself.

Meanwhile, in Derek Time Insurance. Derek is back on the phone, "Hello, I'd like to speak to Watcher Flynn." He is utterly unconcerned by Yokcos acting very strange outside his shop. Let me point out Yokcos has always been Yokcos, always will be Yokcos, and it will never change.

▬ÌÌ!À least I have my sharpie, wait, I don't have my sharpie anymore!" Mercerenies tries to use alchemy magic on Lukasmah in wherever this is. It doesn't do anything, as usual. Lukasmah points at the nearest person to him, he is not a logical man, so he points at Mercerenies. He had a 50% chance of being correct and he got it wrong.

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Yokcos Sandwich Stand
- - Yokcos
- - Broken Phone
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time
- - Confused Receptionist

Waiting List:
Lukasmah
Mercerenies

 

[Mercerenies]

With my quick reflexes, I notice the edit to Roy's post which added a statistic that wasn't there before. What sort of world do we live in where numbers and statistics make sense?! I leap through reality toward the UNIVERSE OF NONSENSE, where numbers do not make sense and 1 + 1 = (void*)(-7).

 

[Forgeio]

I walk out of my house, thinking its a beautiful day. I go to church, then go shopping for sandwiches. I then get in my Camaro convertible and drive home. When I get home, I eat a sandwich and see a letter, the letter is an invitation to the sandwich robots forum game. I walk outside, climb back into my Camaro, and drive 40204 miles to the nearest shoppe for planes. I grab the cheapest plane and then tell them to keep it in the garage for me. I then go to college for 201 years and learn how to operate a plane. I then take my plane out of the garage, and realize that in 201 years it has rotted away. I buy another one with my remaining money, fly to the nearest runway to take off, and do so. I then fly my plane 40204 miles BACK home and grab the sandwiches that I bought earlier, I then realize that sandwiches rot too, so I flew back to the airport, parked my plane, got in my Camaro and rode back to my hometown and got more sandwiches for the journey. I then drive back to the airport, climb in my plane, fly it to the nearest runway yet again, take off eating a sandwich, and then ride into the horizon. Once I get to the center of the horizon, I realize I forgot something. I fly back to the airport, get in my Camaro, speed home, get some paper and write my signup slip on it. I then run back to my Camaro, speed to the airport, go to the runway, take off, go to the center of the horizon, and then drop the piece of paper. It falls perfectly into the sandwich robots mailbox. I smile.

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Forgeio

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Forgeio isn't in his house, he just left the Insurance broker. Either way, he tries to find a Church. He finds one, there's a Priest there. He's looking concerned. "Hello, have you seen Watcher Flynn anywhere?" Why do people keep asking about him? You leave the Church and try and go shopping for sandwiches in town... slight problem... you are the guy which sells the sandwiches. Also, the phone you use to order sandwiches is broken. You sit at your Sandwich Stand completely dumbfounded.

The Waiting List:
Mercerenies jumps through and edits a statistic, which in a way I guess, happens. It feels less chaotic now. You're not entirely sure what that means. Mercerenies is about to break everything when he's interrupted. "You can't jump through the Universe to the world of nonsense if you're already there."

A voice emerges from the shadows, bringing stability to the world. But only slightly. Everything looks a little more clear. "I wouldn't worry about anything making sense here, or numbers for that matter, or even sandwiches."

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Forgeio Sandwich Stand
- - Forgeio
- - Broken Phone
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time
- - Confused Receptionist
- Church
- - Priest Daniel

The Waiting List
- Lukasmah
- Mercerenies
- Yokcos
- ???

 

[Yokcos]

Eat the robot

 

[roytheshort]

Current Player:
Forgeio

Inventory:
1 Sharpie

Sandwich Robots:
Yokcos tries to eat a robot, but there are no robots here to eat. He sits at his sandwich stand contemplating the broken phone. Not much is happening out here at all.

The Waiting List:
Nobody says anything to ???, he sits in the nothing not really doing anything. He feels slightly awkward. After all, he's known Lukasmah, Mercerenies and Forgeio forever. They've never left this void. They've always been here.

Locations:

The Town
- Sandwich Stand : Yokcos Sandwich Stand
- - Yokcos
- - Broken Phone
- Derek Time Insurance
- - Derek Time
- - Confused Receptionist
- Church
- - Priest Daniel

The Waiting List
- Lukasmah
- Mercerenies
- Forgeio
- ???

 

[Lukasmah]

Smile at ??? awkwardly.

 

[Mercerenies]

I ??? all over ??? in ??? with a ??? using only my ???.